Wednesday, July 30, 2008

I think I will stay up late drinking coffee and then set the alarm clock for 7:45 to go "running"...

Yeah, right.

Here in the Nebiverse, we are trying to work on our Healthy Habits (yes, I sound like a government propaganda poster, bear with me), like Exercising. You know. Physical Activity. So I realized our apartment complex is at the end of this lovely tree-lined avenue, that it provides a perfect 1.3 mile stretch of up and downhill for me to push the stroller with the child and go "running."* (That's a 2.6 mile roundtrip, you know. And it takes me about 50 minutes. Which is around 20 minutes per mile or 3 miles an hour [never say I don't help you folks out with your arithmetic!!] Which I would say is kind of slow, except that I'm pushing 40 lbs of child and stroller and a good part of it's UPHILL.**)
(Am I the only person who does mental math while exercising to fight off the mind-numbing boringness of it all?)

*It is only fair to disclose to you that the Nebiverse definition of "running" is not, you know, actually RUNNING, it's more like "I will attempt to walk briskly and if all the planets line up right and my heart soars with the wonder of being alive and I've struck the perfect balance of coffee and rehydrating fluids (but don't need to pee) and food (but not overly full) and sleep then I might, MIGHT spontaneously break into a slow jog, experiencing the joy of feeling parts of me jiggle that aren't supposed to jiggle (high on endorphins, I will tell myself, "YEAH! If I keep this up, they will JIGGLE RIGHT OFF!!, but low on endorphins I will pity the people in the cars passing by...), which will last for a minute or two, until I start to feel winded or the sidewalk starts going uphill or the number of passing cars overwhelms me. Then I realize that when I walk uphill on the Big Hill coming home, I get way more out of breath then when I jog. Which possibly means that my "running" does not actually accomplish that much.

**I mean, part of it is downhill, too. The parts that are uphill on the reverse journey are downhill going the other way. Funny how that works. But I asked Nate, who Knows Everything, and he said that a path with uphill and downhill burns more calories than a flat path even if the ups and downs cancel each other out so that your starting elevation is equal to your ending elevation [wait a second- that's inevitable if you want to go home, isn't it?] ***) In other words, maybe downhill is less of a workout than flat ground, but uphill is so much MORE of a workout than flat ground that it more than balances out.

***This so reminds me of countour integrals, the Mystique of Complex Analysis. Just about all I got out of it at Wheaton was, if you go around in a circle and there's nothing Interesting happening on the inside (Interesting = a Singularity, a point where the derivative fails to exist) then the answer will always be zero. Of course, the rules are more complicated when there IS a singularity inside, and now I'm remembering Professor King saying how absolutely amazing it was that the value of a contour integral could be determined by what was happening INSIDE the countour, and I realized he was right. I had never thought of it that way before. He said something about, "Lay out the New York Times in a circle around a stadium..." I can't remember the rest of it, quite.

So what does it say about my personality that most of my writing is in parentheses or fine print? If you can analyse character through handwriting, surely you can do it through blogging, too, right?

I hope you realize that I have made the normal print on this post larger instead of making the footnotes smaller, in deference to the large percentage of my reading public**** who have middle-aged eyes.

****Love you mom, dad, and Judy. ;-)

My chicken is fussing, so I must go!

Love, Neb/dp

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Well, I don't do math while exercising ... but I *do* find it (exercising, that is) endlessly dull. The only workable workout plan for me has been to ride my bike to work ... except that I'm currently starting work at 4am, and, well ... yeah, I'm going to have to get back to you on that one.

Now, if they marketed exercise equipment with really good book stands on them, I might be persuaded to take them more seriously. Before realizing that they're prohibitively expensive. And I don't want a gym person, because I don't want to be That Person. I have a horror of acclimatizing too much to the Western Suburbs.

Anonymous said...

For anyone interested in mathematical models of uphill and downhill walking, see M. Llobera and T.J. Sluckin, Journal of Theoretical Biology 249 (2007) 206–217.