Friday, October 17, 2008

Overheard at our House

The Scene: Nate is showing Madelaine the motions to Itsy-Bitsy Spider.

Nate: "See, the Itsy-Bitsy Spider..." [Pivots fingers in motion.] "It's a dihedral rotation."

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Cusotmer Assistance Needed in the Shoe Department...

You know it just occurred to me- maybe my first problem is attempting to buy shoes in a store where a salesperson has to be paged to the shoe department ("shoe aisle"...? yeah). Could I be on to something here?

Anyway, as some of you (*cough* Adrienne *cough*) may know, I have always been Shoe Challenged. I blame it on spending my formative college and young adult years with Mathematicians, people who might or might not be wearing matching socks at any given moment, let alone fashionable footwear. Recently I have been working on improving my image a little bit, in a sort of interested but ambivalent attempt to conform to more, shall we say, traditional forms of Modern Feminine Style. ("The chunky, clunky combat boots," Adrienne says. "I just... I wouldn't wear them with that dress."*)

This is where you come in, gentle reader. I need your help. Specifically, this is my delimma:

1) We live in a place with famously Cold Winters.
2) When it is Really, Really cold, I usually either wear pants to church (dress pants or khakis [are they called chinos now...? I'm so stuck in the 90's...]) or long skirts. Back in the day, Pre-Lactation, I wore dresses, but as I don't have any nursing dresses, I think I can safely say I haven't worn a dress in over a year (isn't that sad?) So with my Dockers, I feel happy wearing comfortable socks and my brown loafer-type things, that look something like this...

But with my black dress pants? And long black skirts? I'm a little clueless. I don't exactly think this

would work well in the snow and ice. Especially since I have a feeling you're not supposed to wear comfy thick black tights with them...?


I used to have this pair of black mocs (?? is that the right term??) that I wore all the time with black tights and skirts... they looked something like this, only with thinner soles:


Probably not very stylish, but super comfy and practical to wear in snow and ice. [Did I mention? I trip over my own feet frequently? On flat, dry ground? I am a nightmare on ice? Also I carry my CHILD around now?!?]

These shoes just bit the bullet (I'm pretty sure I bought them at Shoe Parade in 2001 for $20, so they certainly had a good life...), and I need to find a replacement for them.

So my question is: suggest a style of shoe (links would be helpful) that I can wear with some kind of sock or hosiery (you need to be very specific explaining what type) with long (mid-calf-to-ankle-length) skirts and pants when it's COLD out.

Now, I think an obvious choice might be tall black boots, right? With an almost-pointy toe and a token attempt at a heel...? Maybe like these:


I could wear these with both pants AND skirts, right? The only thing concerning me is that it's hard to find boots like this in my price range (the above pair is $173 at Zappos.com. Neb's shoe budget is about $20, maybe $30 at the MOST. I found some brown boots for $10 at The Shoe Department a couple of months ago, but that's RARE.) Also, boots are kind of a Bold Shoe Statement, aren't they? It might be nice to (also?) have something a little simpler. So toss me some ideas, people. I need help!!

Love, Neb

*You should know that I doubt Adrienne ever actually made this statement, as she is Kind and Caring and would never give me unsolicited fashion advice, but after I tried to pick her brain for a LONG time about shoes to wear with dresses and skirts, she did come up with "Maybe more feminine styles...?"

PS I just noticed my child has static cling between her nightgown and her diaper. Isn't that adorable?

Monday, October 06, 2008

Madelaine's Pediatrician Appointment


So apparently, our child's head is still in the "100th percentile."

[What? That's the sound of my Inner Mathematician weeping.]

The chicken has always had quite the noggin, but this was the first time anyone has actually commented on it. The New Pediatrician looked at the chart, looked quizzically at Madelaine's head, took out her tape measurer and tried to measure again a couple of times, asked us if she had always had a big head, looked at the chart again, and asked us if she had ever had a head ultrasound.

Huh?!?

I tried to reassure her, and dredged up from my memory that we also got a "100th percentile" announcement at her nine month visit (albeit with much less drama and fanfare.) She seemed appeased.

Later:

Doctor: "So does she drink from a cup?"
Me: "No, she's just nursing."
Doctor: "Does she drink whole milk?"
Me: "No, she's just nursing."
Doctor: "But I mean, at mealtimes...? What does she drink?"
Me: "She eats food at the table, and then she nurses. She doesn't really drink water or anything- she's just nursing."
Doctor: "So how many times a day does she nurse?"
Me: "Oh, all the time, at least 20...?"
Doctor: "And she nurses a lot at night, too?"
Me: "Yes, all night..."
Doctor: [stopping typing, paying attention now]: "You really need to try to stop that. It will interfere with her growth, Blah Blah Blah..."
Me: "You mean, she'll get too big, or she won't grow fast enough?" [Chicken is now 24 lbs 9 oz, 30 inches tall, which puts her in the fifty-something-eth percentile for height, eighty-something-eth for weight.]
Doctor: "[Something indecipherable] growth hormones secreted at night [something indecipherable]. Plus, she needs her sleep, and you need your sleep, she needs 8-10 hours of sleep a night..."
Me: "Oh, she and I both get plenty of sleep- she sleeps in bed with me, on a mattress on the floor."
Doctor: [Stunned silence. Lots of typing in computer.] "So... she's not drinking from a cup. She's still nursing at night. [More typing.] And you said she's not walking yet?"
Me: "Right."
Doctor: [Silence. Typing.]

I can just see her notes now... "Significant developmental delays. Parents resistant to behavioral modification. Reassess at next visit."

Later:
Doctor [reading from computer screen]: "Be sure you keep cleaning supplies out of reach lock cabinets use outlet covers don't leave her alone in the water don't let her play outdoors by herself when someone nearby is using heavy equipment like a lawnmower [Ed note: ???] praise her good behavior ignore temper tantrums push-pull toys are good baby can eat foods you eat but peanuts popcorn raisins are a choking hazard and should be avoided keep her out of the kitchen while you're cooking do you have any questions?"

Us: "Nope, I think we're good to go here..."

[Honestly... couldn't they just come up with a drive-through vaccination service? It would save us time...]

Neb

Sunday, October 05, 2008

Aunt Adrienne's Visit

We had fun at the playground! There's a video, too, but it's sideways at the moment- maybe Nate can turn it at school, so that I can post it later.