Ending

This morning I got up Very, Very Early after going to bed Very Late (and not sleeping much inbetween because our room was too hot.) I finished grading the final exams, totaled the scores, uploaded them to the online gradebook system, and then spent some ridiculously long amount of time trying to get Excel to drop the lowest two quiz and homework grades for each student. (If any of you ever need it: =SUM(range)-SMALL(range,2)-SMALL(range,1). ) Around 1:30 I was all done, so I sat outside for awhile reading and then went with Nate to the Math Department Chili Eating event. (I had a very small amount of chili. Heartburn-inducing foods are NOT what I need at this point.) His chicken-peach chili (yes, you read that right) was very popular. I liked the chocolate cake.

Also I got my Algebra final back; I got an 83. Which means, I am really, really Done.

In the two years of graduate school, there hasn't been a lot of time when I have felt Free. Last summer and over Christmas break I came close sometimes, though not being Finished yet always made me feel there were things I could study, ways I could be better prepared. On the whole it is an entirely new experience to feel Liberated, to feel that there is absolutely not a thing in the world I am Supposed to be doing. Some moments it is exhilerating, and some moments it is Confusing. I am rather disoriented. The things that Normal People do, do not come naturally to me anymore. I have to remind myself to pick a book to read, watch a TV program, take a walk in the park. I think I need hobbies? Again.

It is probably only the warped perspective of too-recent trauma when I say that this year in school was the hardest thing I have ever done.

I think it's time for bed.





Neb